"Imagine there is a string hanging from our backs, and the average person’s string drags across the ground as we move through life. But I feel like my string is being held by some unseen force, and I’m suspended in a perpetual stillness. This stillness is not peaceful, but overwhelmingly abhorrent affliction. I twirl in space, unable to move forward or backwards, but only to see what was and could be, without actualization."
#jawanza james williams
#jawanza james williams
#moment of gratitude
I did not predict this insomniatic spree. So, I suppose a logical response would be to recount things that I am grateful for to counteract this pessimism and odd paranoia.
Moment of Gratitude:
First, I am thankful for this day (July 4th) because it’s the day my mother was born. Naturally, I’ve led a life troubled by issues that as a child I found myself blaming her for. Between her and my father, were it not for their words, they were the gods of my life. So anything that did not work to my favor (at least from an adolescents perspective) it was his or her fault. I’m thankful that I realized, abruptly, that they are simply people. They bleed, they hurt, they harbor secrets, and shame. But just the same, they are vessels of love, courage, faith, encouragement, compassion and the remaining items on a list of humanity’s many good (yes, ‘many’) attributes.
I’m thankful that I had them for one day, let alone the nearly 25 years I’ve been conscious.
I’m thankful that I know what human error looks like; and I am thankful that I realize it is those very errors that enrich life. Without the winter, what is the reason for spring? How can there be a concept of happiness if there is no trial, no imperfection?
I’m thankful for them, and truly more than I could ever list.
#HappyFathersDay to my father James Edward Williams I.
I am appreciative, and conscious of the fact that my I’ve always known my father. My father has never failed me, and if he did, it is not for lack of trying. I’ve never felt unloved, unwanted, or neglected. I love my father because he accepts me for who I am, and has in fact told me, in so many words, ‘fuck the naysayers, and live your life as you will.’ Thank you, daddy. #family #love #blessing
I don’t know why, but I know this building is famous for something… Hmm
#HotelChelsea (feel free to inform me) #manhattan