I did not predict this insomniatic spree. So, I suppose a logical response would be to recount things that I am grateful for to counteract this pessimism and odd paranoia.
Moment of Gratitude:
First, I am thankful for this day (July 4th) because it’s the day my mother was born. Naturally, I’ve led a life troubled by issues that as a child I found myself blaming her for. Between her and my father, were it not for their words, they were the gods of my life. So anything that did not work to my favor (at least from an adolescents perspective) it was his or her fault. I’m thankful that I realized, abruptly, that they are simply people. They bleed, they hurt, they harbor secrets, and shame. But just the same, they are vessels of love, courage, faith, encouragement, compassion and the remaining items on a list of humanity’s many good (yes, ‘many’) attributes.
I’m thankful that I had them for one day, let alone the nearly 25 years I’ve been conscious.
I’m thankful that I know what human error looks like; and I am thankful that I realize it is those very errors that enrich life. Without the winter, what is the reason for spring? How can there be a concept of happiness if there is no trial, no imperfection?
I’m thankful for them, and truly more than I could ever list.